The Queen Of Pixelss

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Another Day Another Dollar

Be yourself; Everyone else is already taken.
— Oscar Wilde.

Jumping right into blogging I guess. I am currently at work, and should probably be focusing on that more, but I’m at a point where my head hurts and I’m feeling slightly nauseous. I can’t exactly just leave. I mean I need that paycheck for my family.

Some days I can get by with just a slight headache and other days it becomes a full blown migraine. I also have started having a lot more memory loss than normal. I’m usually a forgetful person, but it’s starting causing issues with my family.

A couple of days ago I got a MRI to see if something was going on in my brain. It came back normal. Which at this point, I kind of honestly was hoping there was SOMETHING to explain all of this. My entire life I’ve always been told my aches and pains were all in my head and now it feels like maybe I shouldn’t say anything. Maybe it really is all in my head.

I have an appointment coming up and I’ll keep you all (ha probably no one) posted as to what I’m going through and what the doctor says.

See ya next time

~Queen

The Joys Of Moving

As you all know I’m a super anxious depressed person. My family is in the process of moving. We have a deposit paid just waiting for our move in date and packing.

I work full time and really don’t have time for this even though it’s a bigger place. I’m already stressing about how we’re going to pull this off. And on top of that we have a car that the transmission is out. We have no way of moving it. I got home from running a shit ton of errands and was greeting with my significant other going on about how much work it was going to be. Bunch of car talk. I told him that I’m already anxious about this move, I don’t need anything added to it right now.

Apparently I deserve to get attitude because of this. I’m in the middle of a panic attack now. I don’t know how I’m going to pull this off. I don’t know how to resolve anything. My ONLY weekday off was spent running around. It’s terrible. I never get time for me.

I’m having a tough time right now guys.

Until next time.

Queen

Morbid Thoughts

I’m at a point where I want to leave. Drop everything and just disappear. My life feels like it’s spiraling out of control. Work and home feel like hell.

My home relationships. Kids and my significant other are pretty much gone. I am over touched by the kids and not touched enough by my significant other. Funny how that works.

I know my depression is creeping up. You know how bad it is when I get home from work and want to just crawl into bed.

We can’t find a new home, my work doesn’t pay enough, and nothing is working out. I keep thinking “Well if I leave this Earth at least my kids are set with my life insurance policy…”

I’m not going to do anything though because I know these kids wouldn’t survive with out me.

Until next time.

Queen

Introduce Yourself.

As the title stats, I’m here to introduce myself. I will be going by Queen, though my real name is Nicole.
I have been battling some excruciating migraines recently and wanted a place to log things as I can. My doctor’s aren’t really sure what’s going on and I’m starting to feel they think it’s all in my head… Maybe that pun was intended.

I am a mom and I work full time. This blog will be an adventure through my medical, mental health, parenting, and so much more.

I look forward to Future posts.

See ya next time.
~Queen